When Your Child Bullies…

bullying

Nobody wants to get that phone call…

As parents, we talk a lot about bully prevention and helping kids cope with bullying, but we can’t leave out the other part.  Every bully has parents, and it’s important for parents to know what to do if that phone call does come home from school.

Kids bully for a variety of reasons, and the best first step is to identify the trigger.  There always a reason behind a behavior, even if it takes time, counseling, and a lot of patience to find it.

Teaching empathy is crucial.  Ideally, all parents teach empathy from the beginning.  But it’s never too late to start.

Modeling kindness and appropriate conflict resolution skills is essential.  Kids learn from us.  They see and hear what we do and they internalize it.  That might feel like a lot of pressure, but it’s true.  So we have to be aware of our actions, voice tone, body language, and words.

Books are always useful for young children.  Check these out:

How Full Is Your Bucket? For Kids by Tom Rath & Mary Reckmeyer

One and Zero by Kathryn Otoshi

Help!  A Story of Friendship by Holly Keller

That should get you started…

And please stop by Everyday Family to read more about what to do when your child is the bully.

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About Katie

Katie Hurley is a Child, Adolescent, and Family Psychotherapist and Parenting Expert in Los Angeles, CA. She works in private practice in the South Bay area of Los Angeles, writes for PBS Parents, Washington Post Parents, and the Huffington Post. She is the author of "The Happy Kid Handbook: How to Raise Joyful Children in a Stressful World" (Tarcher/Penguin, 2015) and the forthcoming "No More Mean Girls: The Secret to Raising Strong, Confident, and Compassionate Girls" (Penguin Random House, 2018)