It Takes a Village…

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“You cannot escape the responsibility of tomorrow by evading it today.”

-Abraham Lincoln 

The moment you bring a child into the world, you enter a social contract of sorts.  A mom contract, really.

You agree to love and nurture that child.  You agree that, to the best of your ability, you will teach right from wrong and help that child grow into an independent and responsible adult.

You agree to accept responsibility for that child along the way, because that child is yours.  Your choices, behaviors, and attitudes will shape that child as he grows.

But you also enter a village of parents.  The cliché is old and well worn for good reason.  It truly does take a village to raise a child.  And, as responsible parents, we all have the opportunity to pitch in and help out when another parent needs a hand.

We don’t, of course, sign any such contract or truly agree to any such terms upon leaving the hospital with our tiny, helpless, bundles of joy.  But wouldn’t it be great if we did?  Figuratively speaking, naturally. Let’s face it; leaving the hospital requires enough paperwork as it is.

But wouldn’t it be nice of we were all on the same page with this parenting thing?

Please stop by moonfrye to continue reading The Mom Contract

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On Mothers and Daughters

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Mother’s Day is almost here…

Please head on over to moonfrye to read about mothers and daughters.

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Embracing Differences

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If there’s one thing that drives me just a little bit nuts, it’s when I hear people say, “We just have to accept people for their differences.”

Acceptance isn’t necessarily a good thing.  Acceptance sometimes implies that you might really want to change something but can’t so you just give up and accept your fate.

That’s not much of a life lesson for kids.

I truly believe that we need to teach kids to embrace differences.  We need to find the positive and highlight it.  We need to show them that different is amazing.

My husband is different.  He always was.  And that difference is everything.  I wrote about him on moonfrye today…please stop by and let me know what you think about raising different.

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The Power of Words

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Words can be powerful.

Words can make or break a day.

And words are not easily forgotten.

Please stop by moonfrye to read more about words of love.

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Share the Light

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“There is more good than bad in this world,

More light than darkness,

And YOU can make more light.” – Peter H. Reynolds

 

We need more light in this world.  Please stop by moonfrye and Make More Light.

And please, pretty please, share the light.

We just need more light.

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Transitions

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Transitions can be hard.

Little things seem enormous when the babies that once slept peacefully on your shoulder grow and change right before your very eyes.

And forget about the mom guilt.  It doesn’t matter if you work full time, part time, or stay at home.  I’ve spent the past six years making sure that I didn’t miss a beat (even while I worked part time), and still the little changes feel large and life changing.

Kids grow.  They learn, laugh, play, and cry…and all the while they grow up.  As much as we might want to freeze time or screenshot every moment, they just keep moving forward.

It’s exciting and fun and fills you with pride, but is also brings tears and longing.  Because the truth is that each little milestone is a big step toward independence.  And while we might take pride in each moment, big and small, we also know that they are separating.  They are doing what we helped them to do, and yet we want them to stay by our sides.

It’s up and down, this parenting gig.  Highs and lows are everywhere – and the feelings are simply overwhelming.  Rolling waves on the mighty Pacific have nothing on the give and take of letting go and moving forward when what you really want to do is hold them close forever and ever.

But…we have to let go.  In tiny steps, with tears hidden beneath smiles, we have to let go.

This week on moonfrye – Liam made a big change.  He handled just as I knew he would – with ease and comfort.  I, however, am still a work in progress.

And don’t even get me started on Riley’s loose tooth…I am so not ready for big teeth, my friends.

See you at moonfrye!

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Forgiveness

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“The weak can never forgive.

Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” –Mahatma Ghandi

 Please stop by moonfrye when you get a chance.  Forgiving isn’t always easy to do, but it’s so very important.  It’s an essential skill to teach our children.  It makes the world a better place.

Please take a moment to read about practicing the art of forgiveness and let me know what you think.

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On being kind

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My husband is one of the good ones.  I could gush about him for hours and label absolutely everything that I love about him, but the thing that I love the most is that he’s kind.

He knows when to listen.  He knows when to hug.  He knows when to challenge.  He knows all of this because he is kind.  He takes the time to think of those around him before he speaks.

He holds the door.  He helps me with my coat.  He even throws a hat at me when I’m running out the door on a chilly morning – not at all dressed for the weather.  He does all of that because he’s kind.

People often ask me how to talk to their kids about bullying.  How should they explain it?  Should they actually use the word “bully”? Should they tell their kids to defend themselves or to yell for help?

There are advocacy groups all over the place working hard to put an end to bullying.  They raise awareness.  They share statistics.  Some of them even have “tool boxes” available.  I love that people are working around the clock to stop the cycle of bullying that takes the lives of our children.

But I despise that such a task exists.

The truth is that it shouldn’t be this hard.  By no means should bullying be an epidemic.  If parents would simply choose to teach kindness, the violence and hatred would cease to exist.  It’s simple, isn’t it?

I’m over at moonfrye today with my thoughts on kindness.  Please join me over there – and then sit down with your kids and talk about kindness…because kindness counts.

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Living in the moment

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Do you ever feel like you spend so much time taking pictures that you forget to actually enjoy the moment?  I do.

I love having a photo for every little thing.  On a stressful day or during a lonely moment, these photos remind me of every moment of greatness that my kids bring into my life.  They remind me to just be.

But the constant picture taking makes it hard to appreciate the moment that is actually happening right before me while I’m busy thinking about the lighting or smiles or silly faces.

In the past couple of months, I’ve made a huge effort to decrease tech time on the weekends.  The constant input from my beloved iPhone often drives me batty – and a frustrating exchange about a work situation a few weekends ago reminded me that I don’t need to answer every email/text/Facebook message just because other people want me to.  There was a time when people couldn’t reach me so easily, and part of me wants to return to that time.

But a funny thing happened as I was learning to set the iPhone to DND and let the clients, freelance projects, and just about everything else wait…I realized that I enjoy every little thing a little bit more when I’m not busy to trying to document it so that I can remember it at a later date.

Pictures might remind us of moments, but we carry our memories in our hearts.

Please stop by moonfrye to read about the importance of letting go of the pictures so that we can create memories

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Hosting a leprechaun

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Riley loves holidays, so the minute Valentine’s Day ended…we moved on to St. Patrick’s Day.  We talked about four leaf clovers, our Irish roots, and what that pot of gold really contains (she guessed happiness – love her).  But when she began peppering me with questions about leprechauns I realized that I didn’t really have any good answers at all.

So we did a little research.  I am now officially fascinated by leprechauns and on a mission to correct their somewhat bad reputations.  While they are known to enjoy an occasional practical joke, they are definitely not as mean as some might have us believe.  They simply don’t like to be tricked by humans.  Is that so wrong?

Anyway, by the end of our exhaustive research I came to the following conclusion:  Leprechauns make a good metaphor.  When you treat leprechauns with trickery and teasing, they trick and tease you back.  When you treat leprechauns with kindness, they return the favor.

Riley and I decided to treat the leprechauns with kindness and attempt to host a leprechaun of our very own.  And you can read all about it on moonfrye.

See you there!

P.s. Cute and easy craft included.  Enjoy!

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